As surgery approaches, I am doing really well.
I don't feel scared.
I am excited. Excited to get a healthy heart. Excited to see Ollie thrive post-surgery.
She is so full of life right now, I can't imagine what she will be like when she feels great! I know I will be nervous as the date approaches.
I can honestly feel the prayers surrounding my family. All 3,000 prayer postcards are gone. They went fast, unbelievably fast. So if you have any left pass them out, get them on fridges, hairdressers counters, and stores so people can see her face and pray over her name.
After we passed out all the postcards, Aubrie started asking questions.
Trust me, talking about open heart surgery with your 5 year old is just something you never want to do. She was scared. She wanted to know if Ollie would die. It hurt my heart. It hurt for myself, but it hurt a lot for Aubrie. She's 5 & honestly this journey we are on just really sucks sometimes. That's not the nicest & most faithful thing I can say, but yes open heart surgery on your baby with other little kids in your house that understand what's going on - well it just does suck.
I did my best. I reassured her that yes, Ollie could die, but I don't believe that she will die. I don't want her to be scared. I told her that without this surgery Ollie would die so this surgery will save her life. I told her that Ollie has the best doctors in the world. She will be at the hospital where my brothers were & they had the best doctors in the world taking care of them, and they truly did. She was worried because my brothers died because their heart was broken too. It told her they couldn't fix Danny & Doug's heart & they live with Jesus celebrating in heaven, but the doctors can fix Ollie's heart. That her heart is different than Danny & Doug and that they fix hearts like Ollie's every single day. At the end of the conversation she gave me a hug & skipped off.
I think I did a good job calming her fears. I just pray that when we are in St. Louis with Ollie and my family that Aubrie & Everett are not scared. My cousin, Ellen, is taking care of them for a few days since Maggie & Kylie will be with us. Ellen is like a big sister to me & I know the kids will have a blast with her and her 3 kids. I just hope she's up for the task! Everett will keep her on her toes for sure :)
Oh and tomorrow is all about Ollie! First she gets dedicated at church - then a lunch at Mom's to celebrate! Prepare for pictures because she's going to be super cute tomorrow!