One of the scariest things for me is our future regarding Ollie.
Not the typical fears that others immediately think of like never having an empty nest...
in all honesty I think it's easier for me to imagine her living with us forever.
School scares me. At age 3 she ages out of Early Intervention where she gets therapy now, in our home, with me watching and learning. When she goes to school it's out of my hands, and kids aren't always nice. Thank the good lord for Aubrie, Everett, Caroline & Penelope to ensure kids are nice to Ollie Faith. I get so mad when it's on TV. I've been bombarded so much lately with uneducated people tossing around the word retarded like it's some hilarious joke, but if it happens to my sweet girl, I can't even imagine.
Another fear is boys. That's right I said boys. The thought of her having a boyfriend, although I have a few cuties picked out for her, scares the crap out of me. And marriage - oh dear - marriage let's not even go there. And let's face it, Ollie Faith is a charmer - what boy could turn her down??
Living on her own - ugh - I think I'd rather her live with me or in a house right down the road too.
And the worst part, the high rate of Alzheimer's and the shorter life span.
It's so far away, and so very scary to think about if I allow it.
So I push myself into a positive mindset & move on. She is only 6 months old, so why fret over something that is unknown.
I'm focusing on eating up her smile every day, letting her know how loved she is, and working on her therapy. She's having a blast now that she's healthy & I'm having a blast with her.
I never would have dreamed how fabulous she would be, but now that she's here I can't imagine her any other way! She's a rock star!
And since I'm totally random all the time, just an FYI - I am totally looking forward to October - Down Syndrome Awareness month - and blogging daily about Down Syndrome. Last year that month was a hard month & blogs lifted us out of the dirt, shook us off, and gave us a firm kick in the butt that everything was going to be perfect. So many mamas, so many blogs, fabulous pictures of adorable kids, so much good information - eek I'm excited to take part this year!!
God has a plan. You are wise to trust him. He loves her even more than we do. She is going to this world by the tail. She will be just fine. I know it.
ReplyDeleteAnnie, God placed "Ollie Faith" in your arms for a reason. He knows you and Jade and what you are inside and out. I know its easy for me to say, but leave Ollie Faith in His hands because He has a plan for her, otherwise, she wouldn't be here. I believe She is here to change the world in a mighty way.
ReplyDeleteI turned 70 this month! One advantage of getting old, you can look back and see how God has worked in your life. How He brought about changes because of what He placed in your life. Ollie Faith is here for a reason and God has great plans for her. Just love her and let God have control.
Love your family.
Connie
I'm glad that I'm not the only one that worries about all of those things! I try not to worry because: 1. God has a plan 2. He doesn't need my help mapping it out 3. Worrying won't do any good. But still, it's what we mothers just do sometimes.
ReplyDeleteYour fears are shared by many, our family being some of those. I try to have faith in God's plan. I do feel lucky that V has older siblings like Ollie who loves her and who will watch out for her as well. God's plan for Ollie will be amazing.<3
ReplyDeleteIts so funny you should write this post today...Last night for the first night in a very long time I sat up thinking of Russells future, worrying about all the unknowns that lie ahead. Good to know I am not alone!! I guess all we can do is take it one day at a time :)
ReplyDeleteHi Annie,
ReplyDeleteI don't know if you've heard of Barbara Curtis and her Blog "Mommy Life", but you MUST visit/read/follow it! She is a mother of 12, several which have DS. Read her post from today, it was written just for you!
mommylife.net
*HUGS*
Bertie in NH
You are not alone - in your fears; in your faith; in your love for these precious ones God has entrusted to us (and our grandchildren)...
ReplyDeleteHi Annie, I was wondering if you've ever seen a documentary called Monica and David? I have seen it a couple of times and I fell in love with the film.For anyone who has not seen it it is a documentary/ love story following two awesome people with DS and their families as they prepare for their wedding and their life together as a married couple. I read your post today and that is what popped into my head :)
ReplyDeletePS. Whats not to love about Ollie? She's FABULOUS!
Annie I can relate to these feelings although my daughter's "special needs" came later. I worry everyday about a boy taking advantage of my daughter and whether the friends she's made in college will stick by her. HS friends dropped her at the hint of something "different". What I do know is that my Wendy will be in my life forever, closeby in case there is a problem. I can handle that. I, like you, wonder what will happen after we are gone. Fortunately she has a wonderful brother who will pick up the slack. His bride to be (2 weeks!) accepts Wendy as she is and I know will fight for her as well.
ReplyDeleteOllie has a terrific support system and the general public is becoming (even if it is slowly) more aware of accepting people with differences. Time is on our side and of course so is love. Ann {{Ollie}}
Annie -- that little beauty is incredible. I cannot imagine anyone saying or doing anything to hurt her but I know the sad state of despair that many live in, so yes, I know it will probably happen at some point. God says we turn the other cheek, but when it comes to our kids --- especially the vulnerable ones, that's pretty difficult. So, if you ever need help with any kind of smackdown...just kidding. Sort of. :)
ReplyDeleteBig hugs to you and all your little beauties. Happy long weekend. :)
Annie,
ReplyDeleteI first stumbled upon your blog while searching for decorating ideas. When you began writing about your pregnancy and sweet Ollie Faith, I was completely hooked! You see, I am a teacher, a special education teacher. I am that teacher that children move onto after early intervention services. I teach in an inclusive preschool classroom in a public school. The awesome thing about my class is that yes, it is a class for students with special needs, but it is so much more! We have typically developing peers that attend our class also. My goal for my class is to develop a culture of kids that not only work with and play with, but also love and care for ALL people they come in contact with. I can't imagine how scary it is for you to speculate your future. But, I agree with what others have said...God definitely has a plan! I just wanted to let you know that there will be people that God puts in place to love and care for sweet Ollie Faith as she moves through her future. I have no doubt that with a family like yours, Ollie Faith will be insanely successful! I truly enjoy reading about your family! Thanks so much for sharing!
Hi
ReplyDeleteMy name Jenna and I came across your site. Ollie Faith is beautiful and cute. She is precious and special. She is a courageous, strong and determined fighter. She is a brave warrior, smilen champ and an inspirational hero. I was born with a rare life threatening disease, and developmental delays. I love it when people sign my guestbook. www.miraclechamp.webs.com
Yes these kinds of worries tend to sneak in sometimes. So far it seems to me that the day to day is much easier than worrying about the future. But I don't have any wise advice on the subject. I do, however, need to comment on the little arm rolls that Ollie is sporting. Oh my cuteness!!
ReplyDeleteI just read this post & it broke my heart a little bit. I'm not sure if you remember (and I know this is very different than Miss Ollie) Macie had a LOT of serious issues w/her hearing, and that affected her speech dramatically (especially until she was in 3rd grade or so). The first time I witnessed a child tease her about her speech I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. I hate that kids are so cruel (intentional or not), and I hate even worse that sometimes adults (parents/teachers/etc) are so oblivous to it. I agree with your mom. Things will be great with Ollie, and I KNOW from experience God will give you the grace to deal with it if anyone ever is hurtful toward her. And if not...I'm not above smacking the crap out of some mouthy little brat. sadly I'm only partly joking...obviously I still have some unresolved anger lol
ReplyDeleteThis post touched my heart. Thank you for sharing!
ReplyDelete