Friday, December 31, 2010

Too Many Hormones...

As February approaches, I notice my emotions are going a bit hay-wire.  Perhaps it's the fact I'm 33 weeks pregnant, and my hormones are out of control.  Maybe it's the fact that I am scared to death about what is to come with Ollie's health.  The what ifs, if I allow them, became deep and wide and dark.  Trust me, I have never realized before what a true miracle it is to have a healthy child.  I took it for granted when I had Aubrie & Everett.  I am so blessed to have them period, let alone the beautiful children they are with good health.  It is honest to goodness a gift from God that you get to carry a baby, and that your baby is healthy.  When you are faced with news that your child isn't healthy, she needs surgery, well everything else kind of melts away.  Then, you realized how stinking blessed you are to live here - in a country where we have the medical teams to save her - if I lived somewhere else that wouldn't be the case & I can't even imagine how that would feel.

Ollie's Face

Her room awaits her - filled with happiness and gnomes!

It's hard at times to listen to other people's complaints & sickness they are struggling with at home.  It's typically a cold, a fever, a stomach bug.  I wish that was all we had to worry about - it's hard not to let yourself grow bitter.  But, I remember those small sicknesses used to be what I talked about too!  I wish all I had to worry about with Ollie was an ear infection or a cold here and there, or the cold symptoms when she gets here teeth in, but I think those small things will be the things that are normal that we are some what grateful for if that makes sense at all.

Aubrie (5) & Everett (3)
Partners in crime, best friends, slap fight warriors

So please say some prayers for me, and for Miss Ollie today.  I am doing very well almost every day all day, but heart surgery is scary, and I'm only human.  I feel the closer I get to her arrival the more unstable at points I do become - even though trust me I can not stinking wait for her to get here.  I think then it will be better - but it's been a long wait of appointments showing me how broken she is and that unsettling worried feeling in your heart every time she kicks.  I want to fix her, for her to be healed, but that's God's will, and I am yet to fully understand his plan.  Only 6ish more weeks my friends until she arrives!  I think her beauty will blow you all away!  

14 years together, going on 7 years of marriage
Best friends, partners in crime, hug buddies

Thank the good lord for Jade.  Having a marriage like we do was a great base.  Fourteen years together gave us just a start, but what it has happened in our lives & marriage this past 3 months is even more than I imagined.  We are stronger than ever, and more thankful than ever for each other.  I'm very blessed to have his hand to hold and his arms to hug.    I do the best I can, I pray hard, then I pray harder.  I try to bargain with the lord - yes I know that's ridiculous.  So keep on praying for us my friends - and my kids - and my family - and especially my doctors, nurses, and surgeons.  Next Wednesday we head back to St. Louis for a day of appointments.  I love that hospital, but trust me staring at a 60" plasma TV with your babies heart the size of your hand with a big hole in the middle of it is really not fun, or enjoyable, but we do it with a smile on our face and a song in our hearts. 



Psalm 139:13-18




I also apologize if this seems depressing or if I seem ungrateful for anything I have at all.  I truly don't mean it to come off that way.  This blog is my journal, to track my feelings, and my life & I need to remember my dark days as well as my bright ones.  I have all the faith in the world that Ollie will be just fine - my faith is not wavering - my hormones are!  I pray the next 6 weeks fly by, and I expect they will as we also start the basement renovation for Maggie's sweet family to move into!  We have a lot of work to do in a hurry!

Sunday, December 26, 2010

A Gift I Adore

It seriously doesn't take much to thrill me.  I'm very easy to please!

I told you my Grandma Toots made each family a stocking this year.  She spent days working on embellishing our stockings with yo yos she handmade, buttons, and other trinkets. 



To say I LOVE mine is an understatement.  I kept hoping my family got the red one with all the yo yos.  Some people probably think it's tacky because it's far from Pottery Barn or anything in the stores, but oh my gosh I was seriously thrilled.  It's totally me, and made by my Grandma!  I want her to make me 4 more so we each have one next year.  It's fabulous, and one of my most favorite gifts!!

Mom's Gift

When it comes to my Mom - my Dad gives the best gifts.  He's very thoughtful, he listens to her, and he creates masterpieces.

This year I think he has outdid himself.  I don't know how he will ever top this gift!  Unless I get one too!

He built Mom the most darling playhouse - equipped with wait for it - electricity too!  She'll be searching for the perfect vintage fixture ASAP.


We chose pink because she always wanted to paint her farmhouse pink with green & cream trim when we were little.  We thought it was perfect for a playhouse!  Isn't the scalloped trim detailing the cutest!  He still has window boxes & shutters in the works, but time ran out!  This was a 2 week project that involved son in laws.  They did a great job & now they know how to build them for their wives!!  Hint hint!


We painted the inside a shade of turquoise & Dad laid old vinyl flooring down - it's fabulous too and perfectly my Mom!  The porch ceiling & inside ceiling are a lighter shade of turquoise - something she has always loved as well!


Aubrie was thrilled & honestly has kept this secret for 2 whole weeks - pretty impressive I'd say!

Seriously it's so stinking cute!  now Dad just has to get it out of the machine shed with a tractor & into the back yard!  I'd bet he does this tomorrow while the ground is still frozen.  I know Mom is dying to decorate the porch & inside and has big plans for the grand kids in this baby!


She was so excited.  I think she knew he was building her a shed, most likely a playhouse, but I don't think in her wildest dreams she thought he'd come up with all of this!!


Aubrie Grace turned 5!!

I don't know how, or when, or why, but my baby girl is now 5.  Big girl legs and all.


My little sister is also 24 - not sure how that happened either!  Their birthday is 1 day apart, so Maggie I think is thrilled to share a party, the cake, & the glory!


She got a Disney "creature" cake & loved it.  Thank you Abbie Jane for ordering it for me in the week of chaos I had!


This year is the first year she blew out her candles & this face is priceless!


Everett immediately did the finger dip.  Cakes wouldn't be the same without brothers doing finger dips in them!


The entire family was over & it was a full house.


Aubrie loved it! 


Now I have to realize that in August she'll go to school every day all day long & then - she'll turn 6!! 



Christmas Lovin'

Wow -this long weekend of my life has flown by! 

Christmas was beyond great this year!  Both kids were old enough to actually get what Christmas was & enjoy being around all their family!

This is Everett and my Grandma Toots (the real Ethel Edith).  Isn't she a doll - I mean seriously she's too cute!  I want to say she's 86 this year, but I lie too often so I may be off a year.  I think she's 87 this spring though.

Aubrie enjoys a good pose & a candy cane.  See how packed Grandma's house is!  It's the BEST house for Christmas - she goes all out.  If you can tell above the windows are stockings she made for each family that are all bedazzled with trinkets & yoyos.  I LOVE mine!!


This is Grandpa Howard.  He is 92.  He's pretty cute too!  He gave me a big long hug when I left - I do love him so.


Maggie took this picture of Jade & I and it's really cute!  I just love this man so much & am so blessed each and every day with him.  See the tinsel wreath above us?  Oh there are many many more in this fabulous huge bungalow of Grandma's!


Maggie & Kylie are pretty cute too!  Behind them is a big mural above the fireplace that they found under old wall paper - so neat!


Bean was having a great time.  She let her thighs out to play for awhile and laughed hard with her cousins!


At home on Christmas morning was my favorite time.  My mom took my kids shopping for Jade & I and Aubrie did all the wrapping.  I still can't get over how great my package was wrapped.


I did though when I saw Jade's gift because it was even better!  How cute is that Aubrie of mine?!?


The kids had a blast and got way too many things.  Their favorite gift - two fantailed goldfish named Tuna & Patty.  Their second favorite - pillow pets!

I took a bit of time for a homemade Christmas and made Everett a robot pillow with an E.


Then I made a Russian doll pillow with an A for Aubrie.  They liked them, not as much as the fish & toys, but they were excited - I packed them in a huge box to throw them off!


My best gift was the paintings made by the kids.  Aubrie's is the top, it's a cat in the rain - funny I know.  Everett's is I think just the rain.  I'm not really sure.  I hung them in my bathroom so I can see them every day.


For church they got dressed in their finest!  We have a very casual church so we don't do this often, but my gosh they were cute today.


It took multiple tries to score this picture.  Aubrie finally stopped tickling his ear, and he was finally able to get her hair out of his face!


Tonight we went to Mom & Dad's.  We were all dying to get there.  We usually go Christmas day, but a wedding in Zac's family pushed us back to this afternoon.  We still had a fabulous time and got in some much needed naps!

Maggie got Dad the best gift - a shark tooth necklace.  It's a long standing joke & oh gosh it was funny.  She measured her thigh to know how big to make the leather strap for the necklace & it was tight.  Can you even imagine a neck made of steel - as big as a 24 year old woman's thigh?  Too stinking funny!


Mom found his second best gift.  A man's sized box of Whitman's.  This is his favorite gift at Christmas & when she found it I insisted she had to buy it for him.  The inside is ridiculous!


We got Mom a great gift.  A portrait of her house by Farmgirl Paints.  She cried which made it even better!


I forgot to take pictures at Jade's Moms.  We spent time there Christmas day and her food is to die for.  I'm still full today from it all!

More to come of Mom's special gift from Dad.  Prepare to be amazed!!




Monday, December 20, 2010

Serious Partying!

video


video

Aubrie's 5th birthday party was a hit.  We wrapped things up with a dance party to Yo Gabba Gabba.  Aubrie picked up some new body roll movies from the Disney parades which are hysterical and flipped the glasses right off her face, Everett jumped around so much he flipped his recliner, Caroline rocked out her chubby thighs in circles, and I laughed so hard I cried.  Plus, I may have snorted a few times on the video.  Please enjoy the chaos that is my house on a regular basis!

Favorite comments from the kids:

Everett:  "Aubrie's not 5!  I'm 46!"  This is so funny because Everett not once has realized that he is 3, he only replies I'm not 3 I'm big.
Aubrie:  "It's so beautiful Mommy - so beautiful that it breaks my heart"  About the jewelry box I bought her with the fairy ballerina. 
Aubrie after a discussion about her growing up too fast.  "I have to keep growing, but I promise to take it day by day."
Aubrie after opening her gift from her aunts a Nintendo DS - "I love it I got a N-tendo"

Overall it was a great time!  I still can't believe my biggest girl is 5 - it kills me, but she's sweet as can be and brings me so much joy!  Life is good!

Time Flies - Aubrie is 5!!

I don't know how or when, but Aubrie grew up on me.  Her chubby cheeks and baby thighs are gone.  She's officially 5 years old.  She talks like she's 12, and acts like she's 15.  I'm not ready for her to be a big girl yet!

5 years ago the night before I had her, I ridiculously cried in the bath tub.  Jade couldn't quite figure out what my deal was that night.  I was so scared for some reason of delivery & becoming a Mom and suddenly realized I didn't take a class on how to take care of her other than nursing.  How would I know when she needed a bath, and how to change her diaper.  Ridiculous - I know.

Then, on December 20th at 6:15 PM she came into the world.  7 pounds 12 ounces at 20 1/2 inches long with thick black Mohawk hair.  Jade bawled like I've never seen him cry before, and we became a family.  She was beautiful.  I remember thinking, she is the prettiest baby I have ever seen.  Honestly, she was!

She was a difficult baby.  She had trouble nursing and we'd both cry, but we finally got the hang of that and she nursed for a year.  Then, she had colic and would cry for hours at night until we let her start sleeping in our bed full time.  She slept with us until we moved to our new house and made her bed a new routine.  She loved Trace Adkins & for her first Valentine's day my Mom bought her the Honky Tonk Ba Donka Donk CD - it calmed her down every time.  She was quite the diva! 

She was beautiful and really knew how to rock a Mohawk.  Everyone at church loved her and she was perfect on her baptism day in her Great Great Grandpa Jack's baptism gown.


She adored her daddy.  You can see why she's pretty, because he is very pretty too!  They watched Cardinals games together and that year the Cardinals won the world series while she laid on his chest.  At night we would watch the Top 20 Countdown on CMT every single night to put her to bed - until she was literally 20 months old.  To this day I can hardly stand country music.  She ruined it for me.


She was and still is full of personality, especially around her Grandma Janie.  Grandma Janie is her one true love and to this day, her favorite person ever.  They are two peas in a pod.  I'm glad they are close and I don't really ever see that changing.


When she was 20 months old she got glasses & became a big sister in the same day.  I remember crying over her glasses worrying about covering her beautiful face, and now she looks odd without them.  She makes glasses cute!  She loved her baby brother and was so proud of him.  Now that I look back on it, she was still a baby, and I don't know how I survived some days.  Now they are so close in age, but they play together and for the most part get along well - the hard times I had were well worth it!


We finally moved into our own house when Aubrie was 22 months old, and Aubrie had a big yard that was safe and away from a road.  She developed a love of trees & helping plant them is one of her favorite things.  This is a tree she helped put into the ground & oh how she was proud of it that day!  She's such a ham and a mini-me.


Aubrie adores her brother, and he loves her.  They are always kissing and hugging to the point it's almost embarrassing in public!  As soon as they are done hugging they are sure to always slap each other and then run around the staircase in a mad dash.  It's always loud and hectic at my house & someone is going to time out most of the time.  That's how they work, but no matter what they are always best friends & partners in crime together.


My best friend has a little girl, Millie, the same age as Aubrie.  They were fast friends.  So close they cut each others hair.  Seeing this picture again made me laugh out loud!  Melissa and I literally laughed until we peed our pants - I am not even joking!  Even though it was awful thank God we are best friends because we couldn't stop laughing!  Most women wouldn't have laughed like we did that night.


Thank the lord for Aunt Maggie.  A perm later for Aubrie and a sweet haircut & both girls looked styled.  You couldn't tell they had done anything other than Aubrie's absence of bangs hidden by curls!  They to this day are the best of friends.


Aubrie started preschool and it nearly killed me.  I knew she'd love it, and she did.  Tiny Tech is one of her biggest joys every week.  She sees her friends and her teachers.  She crafts and is so proud of it all!  I wish I could be a fly on the wall at her school.  She's big into public announcements that really shouldn't be publicly announced - so I can't even imagine the stories that her teachers hear about our family - kind of scary in a funny way!


Last winter she started dance and tumbling and oh my gosh talk about another love.  This year they switched to a closer gym & now Everett goes with her.  They only do tumbling now, and they both love love it.  They crack us up with their tricks and are learning so much!


This year she has grown up the most it seems.  She acts like such an adult and even her body looks like a little girls - no more toddler is left in her!  Her stories have gotten bigger and better and her memory - oh her memory - she has the ability to remember everything in detail for years.  She still brings up Carl the cat she had when she was 2 1/2 - we had him a couple days & he got really sick & passed & I told her he lives in the trees.  I thought back then that small lie would appease her and she'd forget about Carl.  Not the case - she brings him up on a regular basis still.


She is happy pretty much all of the time!  She finds excitement in everything that she does.  She drags Everett and her cousin Caroline around for her adventures.  They are the three amigos & they think they are all siblings which is great!

Her favorite person is still her Grandma Janie.  Together they craft about 8 projects a day.  I made a big bulletin board to display her artwork & I can't keep up with her.  I can't forget to mention her Grandma RuRu.  She loves her RuRu very much and thinks that RuRu is the best at baking cookies, teaching her about aminals, & going on nature hikes.  One of her favorite things to do is to call them both on speaker phone with her random topics of conversation which are always funny to hear from my end!


She started posing in pictures this year - that's a new one.  It always surprises me because you don't expect it at first and she breaks out some funny pose.  She also has started to dance a lot, but it's a weird jerky like break dancing move.  She did it all over the streets of Disney - it is too funny!


She's still a princess, even though she likes the farm & days where she goes on the gator or with Pa to see cattle.  She loves makeup, dress up, nail polish, jewelry of any kind, and lots of hugs from her friends.  She wants to be a veterinarian, chiropractor, cosmetologist, Mommy, and many other things when she grows up.  She doesn't want to be a land surveyor or accounting customer service representative though - Jade & I did not rub off on her!


She couldn't be any cuter.  I'm sorry, but she really couldn't be!


And anything gets her excited to the point where she makes this face then the whole room lights up.  People like her Grandma Janie and her Mommy cry to see her so happy - thank you Disney!

This year has flown by and we have so many more great years ahead of us.  Next year she gets a baby sister & I can't wait to see the new bond she'll form with Ollie.  Then her Aunt Maggie, Uncle Kylie, & Caroline move in until they build their house and she is pumped about that!  I think she'll probably drive them nuts for at least the first two weeks!

  I am so proud of her.  She is so smart, it shocks me sometimes.  She makes me laugh hard even when I shouldn't be laughing.  She is so sweet, I love her hugs and kisses, and I love watching her loving on the entire family.  Her singing just makes my day as do her aminal stories.  I just can't imagine life if I wasn't her Mommy.  God blessed Jade & I in a big way 5 years ago.  I can't believe 5 years ago I cried because I was so scared, and today I cry because time has went just too fast!


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